Sufjan Stevens - Holy, Holy, Holy

dad's rescue

I ran out of gas tonight after work, and sputtered to a halt. There I sat on the side of the road, in a dead car, with a near dead phone, in the pouring rain, at 11:00 pm. With the little battery I had, I called home and alerted the troops (some of which, were in bed), and was informed that Dad was on the way. All I could do was sit and listen to the rhythmic patter of the rain on the roof and the clicking of my lonesome emergency lights. It was a good time...a waiting time. I used it in silence, to slow my racing heart and mind down from finals, Christmas festivities, and regular busy-ness. I tried to listen to the whisper or, in this case, the "patter" God uses to communicate or convict. Amongst the humbling of my heart, the time of confession and silence, and the general recognition of the beautiful God I have in the glorious storminess of night, what was continually brought to my attention was just how marvelous it was to have a Daddy who would come without complaint in the middle of the night and in the pouring rain, to rescue me. It was symbol, so often forgotten, of how much God loves us....that He would send Jesus Christ into the rain and murkiness of sin to save us...that He loves us and wants us to wait on Him, and that He not only saves us, but comes when we call day by day. Dad showed up, greeted me with such warmth, as his truly valued daughter, and finagled the stupid plasticy gas thingy into my car. I know I irresponsibly let it run low, but he came when I called. That was beautiful.

morocco and spain in 4,000 pictures.

on the brink.

Tonight, or this morning, I just finished my last ASL paper and quiz, and am starting to hype up on the nerves of the finality of the coming week. I can. not. wait. I do find it discouraging, however, that at the beginning of the semester, when things are less heavily weighted, you have all sorts of energy and enthusiasm, and then at the end, when it is so blasted important, you are almost too tired and worn down to care.
This evening I stopped into a thrift store to begin the Christmas gift perusing process. I love gift giving. It is one of my faves. That balance between finding something they, and you, find delightful?...so riveting. Working at a place where endless glitter garbed angels and statues of arctic penguins are sold, makes me crave the traditional beauty of the past. Give me a fresh pine garland with cranberries, some stained glass candle holders, wonderful shaped cookie cutters, and unique tins...mmmmm, the practical, useful kind of beauty.
ps. are wide pants pase? because i just bought a pair.
sincerely,
the girl who's almost done with fall and can thus move onto winter merriness.

my lil peeps.

Sunday I watched my lil chillins, Thompson, Owen, and Calvin. I was feeling a touch of a sore throat and told Taylore it would be a lay low kind of day, and it very well was. As it trickled dreary hues of colors outside, Thompson and I cuddled in her bed with a movie. The boys crept in after their naps, and I soon found myself snuggled in with little sweaty, soft, post-napping munchins on my lap and all about me. I love that groggy, calm, reserved state children are in when they just wake up (if they're not whiny). After a day of hot chocolate in sippy cups, random bows placed in my hair by Thompson, and a quick glorious romp outside on the trampoline in the rain, I brushed their hair, scrubbed their lil faces, found their shoes, cleaned off their clothes, and handed them over to Grammy for a night of performing on stage at their evening Christmas service. Thank you, dearies, for making me feel better.

folkie love.

Tuesday night was the unveiling of Biola's first folk ensemble. Delicious, enriching, warm...all good words.

merry winter.

by cerloz http://www.flickr.com/photos/cerlo/4356572713/

lulu and the lampshades.

i love this...so. much.

new cousin!

What can I say? She's lovely, charming, and sweet, loves Jesus, art, and...Tristan. Welcome to the family Megan! I am also quite excited for the road trip up to Canada for the wedding...

(photos by Tristan Zastrow http://www.facebook.com/zastronaut)

of late...

Lately I've come to realize how much fellowship goes on around food! It is such a unifier. I've also come to realize how refining and exhilarating the people in my life are. Thank you for that, dear ones. Also...that I love my house, my piano under the bottle ladled window pane, the cozy inviting couches, the fire pit in the backyard, the high paned windows that frame rainy weather perfectly, and my hole in the wall bed room. And lastly, I can't get enough of Thompson, Owen, and Calvin when they come over to "Andarina's" house to spend a couple hours in my "Narnian" back yard. That's all for now...

the best time of day.

My favorite time of day is the turning point from day to evening, when the sun is dappling through the windows in warm golden tones...

sister night.

We made scones with devonshire cream to celebrate our sisterhood with our two dear sistered friends...and then we delved into the nostalgic sentiments of the past with Little Women. It was a charming night...a necessary night.

Scones:
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
2 tbsp (or so) cup cinnamon (opt.)
8 tbsp unsalted butter (chilled or frozen)
1/2 cup raisins, nuts, chocolate chips, apricots etc. (opt.)
1/2 cup sour cream
1 large egg

1) preheat oven 400 degrees
2) mix dry ingredients and then grate butter into the mixture. Use your fingers to work into butter. At this point you can include the raisins, chocolate chips, nuts etc, if you so choose.
3) in a separate bowl whisk sour cream and egg until smooth.
4) Using a fork, stir sour cream mixture into flour mixture until large dough clumps form. Use your hands to press the dough against the bowl into a ball.
5) Place on a lightly floured surface and pat into a 7-8 inch circle about 3/4 inch thick. Sprinkle with remaing 1 tbsp sugar. Use a sharp knife to cute into 8 triangles (like a pie), place on cookies sheet (preferably lined with a parchment paper), about 1 inch apart. Bake until golden, about 15-17 minutes. Cool for 5 minutes and enjoy!

electronic meat.

Saw Electronic Meat tonight...pretty fantastic. Check out there show dates and music here... http://www.facebook.com/electronicmeat?ref=ts

moments from a summer road trip.

A few moments from my 21st birthday trip up the coast to Spokane with Kori and Elise, and then a visit to the Clarksons in Colorado...

ode to mothers.

I thought I'd share a story of the cutest, most lovable..albeit craziest, and most energetic kids. First, Calvin shoves something (yet undecided) down that vent thing they have and I couldn't see it, let alone retrieve it. Secondly, we jumped on the trampoline...all. day. long. and, being the good Narnian Aslan I was, with them on my backs at times. Thirdly, while giving the boys a bath, Thompson sat on the countertop and waited for her turn. I heard a crash and next thing I know, glass was all over the counter, into the bathtub and onto the floor. I did a rescue bath evacuation and shooed the kids out so I could clean up the mess. While thus occupied, a naked little Owen and freshly pajama-ed little Calvin find the sponge paints. Yes...the sponge paints. I caught them just in time to spare their torsos, although Calvin's white pajamas took a hit with a black sharpie. Then, I found poor Thompson crying in bed over breaking the vase... the "special" vase.
"Why is it special Thompson?"
"It's...ittt's.. the vaa*se *gasp* wee...hold our floooooowweers in!!!!!! ah...*gulp*"
Yes, Thompson, that one was way more important than the vases you don't hold flowers in.
And then Taylore walks in right after I get everything cleaned, sans the boys painted hands. I explain the night, and she gives me a sweet, understanding, hug...what a darling...that's all I can say.

one night...it happened.

After a day of Schubert, a geographical sign language lesson with the best teacher (Sandon Larson), and baby sitting Owen and Calvin, while watching them explore our house for the first time, turn my wrapping paper into light sabers and my backyard into a Narnian sea, Shelby and Rebecca came over to watch the dearest most charming movie, It Happened One Night. Goood day.

kellie.

My beautiful friend Kellie...I thought this was too lovely not to share.

beautiful knots.

I am having one of those days where I am in deep self interrogation, just short of self deprecation. Just as I feel like there's no other way I can possibly accomplish things better, communicate clearer, or love people dearer, I hit a knot...a huge knot of soul-questioning and an awkward guilt. Although highly unpleasant, confusing, and mind reeling I have concluded that knots keep me maturing, keep me digesting, and thinking...keep me alive. Knots are good for identifying just how little I know, just how dependent I really am, and for highlighting areas of sin that, if I had continued to plod thinly and weakly along as a string, would have been dead and numb to seeing. They negate me from getting too settled in my limited understanding or apathetic way of loving, and identify my status of fleshly versus Spirit led living. When I hit a knot, I'm coming to learn that it doesn't mean there is something wrong with me, it means the gears in my soul are awake and doing their job at making me aware of my needs and shortcomings. Therefore, I thank you beautiful knots, thank you revealing confusion for sparing my soul once again. That's all dearlings.

touch.

So often today touch is misconstrued, abused, or ignored entirely. These past couple weeks, when out with my girl friends, I so desired to walk as they would in a Jane Austen novel, arm in arm, or arms around each others' waists. But, alas, the world doesn't allow for that anymore. Assumptions are made and they have instantly robbed us of the comfort and propriety of that expression of affection. Last night I was telling my beautiful six year old cousin, Camila, a story. We were laying on the carpet cuddling and laughing in glee, our faces about three inches apart. As I stared into her luminous brown eyes, and she stared in mine, I realized that I never get that close to anyone...I always feel too exposed, too vulnerable, as if they could see every blemish, or they'd somehow misunderstand what my eyes tell them. As I went on about an endangered patch of singing flowers, and artists who draw magical worlds with their fingers in the sky, she tenderly played with my eyelashes, twirled my hair around her fingers and tucked it gently behind my ears, kissed my cheeks and squeezed them at the dimples when I laughed, and brushed her nose against mine in a sweet eskimo kiss. She was innocently and joyfully playing with the most personable aspect of my physical self...which made me feel incandescently adored. I stared at her unabashed and trusted she would have an unbiased opinion of my beauty. It reminded me just how much I love and long for closeness and touch, how much I love my precious Camila, and how much I love the pure affection of children in general.

thrift store finds.

Over the past few weeks I have been hunting in the wells of the past...I thought I'd share my joyous finds.

when sarah came.

This post is a little old, but here it is anyway. A couple weeks ago, Sarah Clarkson came to visit for a few days. One of the days, her and I took the ferry to Balboa Island, ate at a little Italian restaurant, split a delicious Balboa bar, and perused around the quaint little beach houses, critiquing them endlessly. As we walked along, our hearts huddled around the subjects of our futures, our plans, God's will, and the overall splendor of life and our ideals in it. It is so good to have like minded little souls in the world with whom you can muse about your own humble discoveries and reinforce them. We ended the afternoon at Crystal Cove just sitting and exfoliating our skin in the sand. What a lovely person Sarah is! I love her so dearly. God is good for giving us such a beautiful time.